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hye...haha...im dying..damn! today im feel a lot of pressures coming from no wer..i feel really down rite now..dun hv any courage 2 continue my life here..wat is going on wif me? wat happen?... no answer..feel down..feel lonely..feel unworthy...feel useless..all pointless!

y i can cus own path of life? evendo, i've been given the choice, y im so idiot cus da worst, unepi road of life?in my life, der is no ambitions 2 b achieved. evendo, der are a lot of dreams in my head n heart, but hopeless. im nobody, so i absolutely cant c my dreams come true. my ambition is....... haha, dun no 2 answer it.i hate 2 study, hate 2 sit in any papers, hate 2 wait 4 da future results! damn! damn! i dun wanna b here, i juz wanna b at home-my sweety home.

rite now,i juz wanna collect a bundle of money n spend dem together wif my siblings n family..wanna go 4 shopping, wanna ride a car while listening to radio n music...wanna eat alot of japanese food-sushi, sashimi... dakedo, der r only dreams in my big head.i hv nothing 2 make dem come tru..totally a useless person i am!..abah, mama, gomenne..my academic performance are going down.the graph is dropping...plz forgive me. i cant b in a grup of smart students anymore...juz forgive me n accept me as who i am rite now..time is changes, so do i.. dun say dat im epi wif my current life-poor in academic, bad personality, fat, lonely...i hv nothing 2 b proud of now... wat a bad lucK!

impatient 2 b in heaven..ya Allah, am i one of ur servants 2 live hepily ever efter at der? am i will enter ur wonderful heaven? am i going 2gether wif abah, mama n my siblings? am i?..

ya Allah, i need some miracle happen in my life.i wanted 2 b more epi n cheer den b4..i dun wanna b a dull lady anymore.its bad 4 my skin too..i hope my coming result for diz sem will b better den i expected..plez ya Allah..onegaishimasu! hope u can hear my wish..help me ya Allah..im begging u~